I believe that most Americans have been victims of bullying and/or some form of abuse at some time in our lives. As a former counselor and therapist, I worked with and tried to help many victims of everyday bullying, as well as various forms of abuse.
I found that the biggest problem, issue, and challenge they dealt with was that they did not stand up to their bullies and abusers. The best question that I have ever heard a counselor or therapist ask their clients relative to this was the following:
“What parts of yourself don’t you love that allows you to let this bully or abuser continue to mistreat and abuse you?” This question prompted many people to finally make some serious changes in their lives and to walk away from and leave their abusers.
Stewart B. Epstein
Rochester, New York
P.S. I want you to know why I have submitted this letter to the editor to your newspaper.
I spent five years working as a professional counselor and therapist in the fields of Alcoholism, Drug Addiction, and Mental Illness/Mental Health. But for most of my working life, I was a college professor of Sociology, Social Work, and Psychology. I loved my students and cared very deeply about their well-being. I miss them. I miss how idealistic they are and how much they want to try to make the world a better place. A major reason why I submitted this letter to you is because I believe that the question contained within it might help some of your students, especially your female students, who are being abused and bullied by their boyfriends. “Being in no relationship is better than being in an abusive and bullying relationship.”